Healing PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder) naturally was a difficult journey for me, as I struggled to maintain my mental health while dealing with the physical and emotional symptoms of PMDD. In this post, I share my experience with PMDD and how I eventually found natural ways to manage this debilitating condition that affects all areas of a woman’s life.
The Development of PMDD:
Back in 2007, at the age of 32, I made the decision to terminate a pregnancy. Shortly after, I developed PMDD – a severe form of PMT that affects you on every level – physically, mentally, emotionally, and sexually.
I felt like I was losing my mind!
The depression was deep, the physical pain of my periods intensified, my breasts were constantly swollen and painful, and the headaches were never-ending. Then there were the suicidal thoughts – I wanted it all to be over and felt that death was better than living.
Refusing Hormone-Changing Medications and Tracking Symptoms
After going through self-diagnosis the only solutions offered to me by my doctor were antidepressants, the contraceptive pill, or HRT. However, something deep inside kicked in, and said no to both as I’d always had a strong aversion to hormone and mood-changing drugs.
In moments of lucidity and calm amid the chaos, I knew I would have to take matters into my own hands and so began my journey with a Menstrual Journal, which I began to fill out every day, documenting every single aspect of how I felt on a physical and emotional level.
This journal gave me a structure to work within while I navigated the chaos. It became my bible as each day within each month started to reveal the patterns of what I was feeling and experiencing helping me to understand myself on a deeper level.
The more I tracked the more I started to reconnect with a sense of trust that somehow by seeing and working with the patterns and the symptoms I had the power to heal myself.
Introduction of Evening Primrose and Starflower Supplements:
After a month or so of keeping my menstrual diary, I recognised my body needed help to navigate the symptoms I was experiencing. My research revealed Evening Primrose and Starflower supplements to be beneficial in reducing the physical symptoms and mood swings of Premenstrual Disorders so I introduced them into my diet.
Again over the course of the next three months, I continued to track the intensity of my symptoms and I started to see a slight improvement, especially in the physical symptoms however, the suicidal ideation, depression, anxiety and rage were still quite violent.
This prompted me to begin working with Valerian Root for the depression and Bachs Rescue Remedy for the anxiety, again tracking to see if there were any changes.
Gradually over the next six months, the physical symptoms started to ease, my period started to flow again as normal, and I regained my natural 28-day cycle.
The deep depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts also started to gradually lift, which helped me to begin working with my emotions in a whole new way.
The Connection Between Repressed Emotions, Past Trauma, and the Manifestation of PMDD
With deeper introspection, I started to recognise how PMDD was the result of the trauma I experienced through the termination.
My body physically reacted, sending signals of the emotional imbalance that was caused. Not only the repressed emotions from the termination, but also the deeper unconscious patterns created from the sense of abandonment I experienced as a child, and the internal belief system I had unconsciously created around Motherhood, leading to the decision to terminate in the first place.
Trauma resides in the body and if left untended we will keep manifesting illness, malaise, dis-ease, and dis-orders. We might physically heal on one level, but if the emotional roots have not been tended to, the physical symptoms will simply manifest in another place.
Conclusion:
As women, we have so many repressed emotions caused by wounding, trauma, and conditioning we have been exposed to – especially regarding our femininity, sexuality, and emotional state of being. It’s no wonder that they manifest physically in our menstrual cycles.
We suffer in silence, ignoring the signals, and are medically treated in a masculine way of prescribing and suppression through medication, becoming more and more disconnected from ourselves in the process.
Yet our body always knows, and when we give ourselves permission to tap into the wisdom held in our somatic and emotional intelligence they become essential foundation blocks of our healing journey.
Enhancing our ability to listen deeply and intuitively to the needs and imbalances of our body and psyche we are able to act accordingly, making informed decisions from an empowered and centred place rather than unconsciously reacting from trauma
Every day, I am truly grateful for manifesting PMDD, for it has enriched my life in so many deep and powerful ways.
It was my initiation into Shadow Work and the work I now do at The Feminine Principle, supporting women from all over the world to heal their trauma and come back into right relationship with themselves, their body and their menstrual and reproductive cycles.
With Love,
Nicola x
